Thursday, August 28, 2008

Day 9

So I texted that girl I went on a date with and I haven't heard back from her. I'm disapointed. No, worse than that. I feel rejected and hurt and angry.

I saw my ex today, we hung out together and had fun... whenever I hang with her, I miss having a girlfriend because its so fun to just hang out with a girl you like.

I was very tempted to look at porn tonight. Loneliness and frustration from not hearing back from that girl...

I feel utterly alone. it's times like this that my urges for pornography and escape are highest.

I tried going for a walk but the street was empty and cold so I turned around. I sent a text to a co-worker of mine just saying some random thing....


I'm upset because my ex is like my best friend and she's leaving for 3 months... on top of that, its looking like that girl i went on the date with is flaking.

I've got to be strong but I wish I had some support... this is why I need guy friends.

hard night.... I'm choosing to stay off porn tonight and to not masturbate.

It's amazing how I can swing from feeling on top of the world to just utter crap 2 days later. sigh

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