Sunday, July 27, 2008

Day 10

It's day 5 without masturbation and I'm really horny. I had some heavy flirting going on with a girl whose training at my job to work at another store. I don't know if that's gonna go anywhere but we were definitely hinting at hooking up. I guess I should make the move to hang with her sometime this week.

I don't think I would have taken the flirting that far if I hadn't stopped masturbating. I think it gave me the extra desire to go past my fears of flirting and expressing sexual desire in girls.

I totally dropped the ball with imaging sex with the women I meet. I've done it maybe 8 times in the last whatever amount of days its been... but only haphazardly. I never set up a set time to just intensely focus on retraining my mind.

I didn't have time to go out and approach girls this weekend either but I'm gonna have some time this week.

This weekend was busy as hell. Saturday I woke up at 7:30, rode my bike across city to my friends house and we cycled 40 miles roundtrip to a beach and back. Then I rode my bike across city again to get to work, worked 8 and a half hours, rode across city back home at 10pm and finally managed to fall asleep around 11:30. Then I got up at 4:30 this morning, went to work for 7 hours and then collapsed asleep in my bed til just awhile ago... I have dinner plans with my family tonight. MAN.... you call that a weekend? And tomorrow I have to get up at 4:30 again.

At least I'm gonna have 4 days off this week... Tuesday/thursday/sat/sun

I want time off bad...

Not much urges for porn. Tomorrow and Tuesday are my days to ... relieve my stress... and then its no masturbation again for another 5 days. So far this seems like a good system. Feels like a good balance.

1 comment:

  1. Does accountability have a place in your battle against pornography? I find that involving others in the battle is a crucial step towards recovery.

    I know some rely on Internet filters, but for adults filtering isn't a great tool for intentionally avoiding porn. Have you ever heard of accountability software? Accountability software is specifically for adults who want to guard where they go online without any blocking or filtering. Combined with filtering, it's a great Internet safety solution for the whole family. If you want more info about it check out my post “Breaking the Lure of Internet Porn” -

    Also, check out -