Day 57

I bought tickets to Jamaica for april. The last time I left the states was when I was a baby and it was to Cananda. I"m excited... its great having something to look forward to.

Man today was intense. I just did my best to conceptualize all the things I want for this year and how I'm going to work towards them. LOTTA thinking... but I got a lot done.

In regards to this blog, quitting masturbation and dating will take limelight. I feel I've resolved the issues behind why I looked at porn by making a committment to making friends and pursuing women. It doesn't even matter that I haven' t formed many friends or even pursued women to that great of an extent but because I know that I will be slowly ramping up my efforts, I feel no urge to look at pornography.

As for masturbating.... the underlying issues with this are stress-relief, instant gratification, and sexual release.

Masturbation isn't as satisfying as sex. It may be instant but it's not what I really want.

Challenging my beliefs and behaviors, and learning about healthy perspectives on life (ebook: the seven spiritual laws of success), eating healthy, exercising, yoga, and working out relieves the root causes of my stress.

I have faith that as I understand women and dating more, the sexual release thing will come together. I have faith that I can get what I want if I have a strong enough desire, and the patience to really understand what's going on. 95% of this whole thing is resolving my own issues around the subject.