Sunday, July 13, 2008

Day 64 (36 days to go)

Damn man... it's day 7 without masturbations. GOOD GOD...

Here's what I have noticed about going 7 days without masturbation.

I'm horny as hell. I have WAY more desire to have sex with women.

I'm frustrated as hell. There was a point at work today where I had to go in the bathroom, sit down on the 5 gallon bucket they have in there, and just hold my head in my hands.... It's so easy to get sexually frustrated and also just angry in general.

I feel like I have enough aggression to just power through awkward moments like a customer being rude or a girl acting snobbish or screwing up a drink order instead of sitting there getting upset like I usually do.

The downside though is that all this aggression and sexual desire has not freed me from feeling fear in approaching girls. In fact it feels like my fear is magnified.

Not masturbating seems to magnify all my emotions, not just the ones I want (aggression and sexual desire).

Another downside is that I've not cared about some of my other goals like working out and other little odds and ends... All I care about is how I feel because its so powerful.

So maybe 7 days is too long to go without masturbation. I really noticed a lot of these side affects after 5 days. So tomorrow I'm going to jerk off like a mad man and then I'll go 5 days.

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