Thursday, October 19, 2006

Day 51

Day 51 was not a good day. I'm so facking aggrivated. Porn was a means of relieving stress and loneliness and now I don't have a good place to relieve those things.. I'm forced to figure them out.

It's like porn distracted me from things I don't like and now without the distraction... I'm just rubbing salt into wounds.

There's no going back. I've got to heal these wounds instead of using porn bandaids.

TV, video games, and porn distracted me from all the stuffI'm not happy with. I gotta say, that addressing problems feels so much worse than living life in distractions and denial. It feels BAD... it feels like I'm moving backwards and losing progress. I think "man, i was happy before; i must be doing something wrong." Thank god the weekend is close.

1 comment:

  1. You've reached an important stage here. You've pulled back the curtain of electronic media that bombard us every day and are beginning to see your life for what it is. This isn't about a single addiction, after all, it's about self-improvement and happiness.

    If you can afford it, or your parents can foot the bill, or if you have health insurance that covers it, I highly recommend some psychotherapy. I was skeptical of doing it for years, even though my mother encouraged it. Then one day it hit me that I had been mired in a depression for years and didn't realize it. Having someone to talk to about nothing but you once or twice a week is great help.

    Porn Forgotten